The Five Love Languages

When I was out with some friends on Saturday night, they told me about the Five Love Languages, which is based on the book by Gary Chapman that examines the ways in which we experience (and show) love.  The five "languages" of love, in other words, the ways in which we prefer that love be conveyed to us, are: Physical Touch, Quality Time, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service and Receiving Gifts.

You can take the assessment here, and I know you have time to do it, because it consists of thirty EASY questions.  I took the "For Singles" assessment first, because I don't really fall under the other categories (why is there not one for someone in a relationship but not married?), and then took the "For Wives" one next, to see if the questions or results differed at all.  The results were nearly identical.  If you're interested, there is also an assessment about the type of apology that you prefer (Expressing Regret, Accepting Responsibility, Making Restitution, Genuinely Repenting and Requesting Forgiveness), which I found to be interesting.  Apparently, it is most important to me that someone express regret.  Luckily for all of you, my lowest score was Requesting Forgiveness, coming in at zero, so I'm not the type of person who will hold something against you until you beg for forgiveness.

When I completed the "For Singles" questionnaire, my highest score was Physical Touch, meaning that:

A person whose primary language is Physical Touch is, not surprisingly, very touchy. Hugs, pats on the back, and thoughtful touches on the arm—they can all be ways to show excitement, concern, care, and love. Physical presence and accessibility are crucial, while neglect or abuse can be unforgivable and destructive.

My scores were as follows (greatest to least, with 12 being the highest you can possibly score on a section): Physical Touch (11), Quality Time (9), Words of Affirmation (6), Acts of Service (4), Receiving Gifts (0).  So, if we're trying to make practical sense of this:

• I feel most loved through acts of physical touch (and, by extension, show my love through physical acts).  I am a physical person; I hug and kiss family members and constantly kiss friends, even going so far as to hug close friends hello and goodbye when I see them, even if that is quite often.  Those are just a few examples, but that is how I both express love and prefer to have it expressed to me.  In moments when I am sad or upset, I often just want to be hugged or held (case in point: Kristin and Dan were comparing notes this weekend about how much of a crier I am.  Kristin said, "Well, she just cries because she cares, and you just need to know how to comfort her."  I assured her that Dan is a very good comforter.  Brownie points for him!). 
• Quality time is equally important; I feel loved when a friend, family member or boyfriend, takes the time to nurture our relationship and makes sure that the time we spend together is quality time.  I get upset when I feel as though the time that I spend with someone, no matter what the nature of our relationship, is not what I consider "quality time" (i.e. if the other person is preoccupied, constantly answering their phone, etc.). 
• My other high score was in words of affirmation.  I constantly tell the people I care about the most how important they are to me, and I admit that it is nice to hear the same back, whether in the form of birthday cards, thinking-of-you emails or just a verbal affirmation of how they feel about me.  
• Unsurprisingly, receiving gifts got no points. It is true that receiving gifts from people is not the most important expression of love to me; however, that is not to say that I do not take note of when a gift is particularly thoughtful (Dan happens to be an EXTREMELY thoughtful gift-giver, and while I love and cherish all of the gifts that he has gotten me over the course of our relationship, I derive more pleasure from the cards that he writes me).  On the flip side, I try to be extremely thoughtful in the gifts that I give, because it is one way that I express love for people, whether in the form of a birthday or holiday gift or baked goods (yes, those are a constant!).

Again, I highly encourage all of you to take this assessment, because I think it will help me become more self-aware (not that I was not already aware of some of my patters of behavior in that respect) of how I best receive and show love.  I would be interested to hear what all of your results are!

Someone Make Time Slow Down!!!! (please)

I started the weekend early on Thursday night, when Dan and I went to the Nats-Pirates game (knowing full well that it wouldn't matter if we had a late night because all I had to do on Friday was work at graduation). It was a lot of fun, for several reasons: 1) the Bucs won (yay!); 2) Some family friends sat next to us at the game, and I also got to meet one of Dan's golfing buddies, who happened to be at the game; and 3) I got a Shake Shack milkshake.  Heavenly (albeit terrible for you, I'm sure).  All in all, a very fun night, and I was glad that Dan's team won (for those of you who may be curious, while I have become a Pens fan, I will never, EVER abandon my allegiance to the Red Sox, no matter how much they suck.  In fact, I wore my Sox hat to this game), despite some serious threats from the Nats.

My students graduated on Friday under flawlessly beautiful skies, and I was so glad that I got to be there and witness it.  True to form, I cried during the alma mater (and alternately was quite pleased at myself for knowing ALL of the words haha), as well as during President DeGioia's speech when he welcomes the newly-minted graduates to the Georgetown alumni community.  For some reason, that sentiment always gets me.  Georgetown alums are sure a special group :)  I was also reminded of what a nightmare it can be to work graduation when graduates' families tried to walk up to the stage to take pictures of the graduates.  Seriously, one man was practically sitting in the lap of one man in the wheelchair section as he tried to get a picture.  Seriously, people are so inconsiderate!  Thus, my job as bad cop was made infinitely more difficult.

Immediately following graduation, I rescued Kristin from boards studying in Uncommon Grounds and, after stopping by the post-graduation reception for a hot second to grab some lunch, she and I walked down to the mecca that is Baked & Wired and stuffed our faces with cupcakes.  Sure, come to town and twist my arm to eat delicious cupcakes ;)  It was so nice to catch up with my beloved friend as we sat by the banks of the canal.  It is so rare that I get to see my out-of-town girls nowadays, so I was in my element that afternoon.  It also didn't hurt that the weather was, as I mentioned, fabulous. 

On Friday night, Kristin, Molly and I went to Senior Ball to support Kristin's brother, Justin, a Class of 2012 Georgetown College graduate (woo!!!).  Again, twist my arm and make me dress up to go to a BALL.  It was, as expected, a very good time, and, although we all agreed that the literary theme was less awesome than the circus-themed ball our senior year, there was a Gatsby-themed photobooth (complete with accessories) this year, which certainly knocked this Senior Ball up a few notches! 

Right back where we were two years ago

On Saturday, Lauren and I headed to Pentagon City for some retail therapy...and ended up buying the same shorts.  Oops?  In her defense, she bought them first.  Then we went back to her apartment and watched the exciting conclusion of the Belmont Stakes (I could care less about horse racing, but I get easily amped up about major sporting events, so I thought I could spare the three minutes to watch it.  Bring on the Olympics!  Dan and I have already agreed that we're not budging from in front of the TV).  Afterward, I met up with Dan for a delicious dinner at Commissary before heading to Local 16 for the much-dreaded goodbye party for Colleen and Patrick (I say much-dreaded because I have been dreading saying goodbye to them, not because I dread going to parties).  It was a really great time, especially when we migrated to Policy (two weekends in a row, not sorry) and had our own little private dancing area.  Dan, who hates dancing, was an amazing sport about going out dancing, which is one of the many, many reasons why I love him, and I was delighted to have so many of my favorite people together to celebrate two incredible friends.

 I will miss these two so much!!!

Wonderful friends!

 

So much love :)

Yesterday was a complete lazy day once I got home from Dan's.  I did go to the gym (yay me), but aside from that, I lounged around, did laundry, and watched lots of Gilmore Girls and Mad Men (the latter with Molly).  After weekends that jam-packed with activity, I really needed the lazy day.  As a result,  I was able to have a really great run this morning (because I was about as well-rested as I'm ever going to be), despite the fact that I had to fight the urge to stay in bed.  I have a lot of things planned for this week (literally, every night was planned out as of last Monday), including what I'm sure will be more teary goodbyes, but I'm very much looking forward to the long weekend next weekend.  I'm hoping that the weather will hold out so that we can go to the beach! 



Graduation

Wow.  Graduation season is upon us again.  HOW DID THIS HAPPEN???????  It really does seem like just yesterday that my friends and I were reveling in Senior Week and preparing to walk across that stage, but alas, that was actually two years ago.  Sigh.

This graduation season has proven to be a particularly controversial one on the Hilltop this year.  I mean, in general, the University seems to have been in the news a lot this year, but when an uncharacteristically decent lineup of commencement speakers (really, they are usually terrible at Georgetown) was announced earlier on this month, people went bananas. 

Kathleen Sebelius, the secretary of the Department of Health and Human Services and one of the main authors of Obamacare, particularly the portions of it that pertain to contraception, was selected as the commencement speaker for the Public Policy Institute.  Immediately, a maelstorm erupted surrounding the decision, with Catholic archbishops calling on President DeGioia to rescind the offer.

You know what I am most proud of?  The fact that my alma mater (and employer) is a place where people of differing opinions can flourish.  People come to Georgetown to become more worldly and to be exposed to differing opinions, all while receiving a world-class education, not to be around people who think exactly what they think, not to mention what the Catholic Church thinks.  I have said it before and I will say it again; I am a practicing Catholic, but I think that there are many areas in which the Church is out of touch with reality.  Georgetown may be on the Vatican's shitlist, but at least it is a place where civil discourse and free expression are encouraged. The fact that Secretary Sebelius was invited to speak here does not mean that Georgetown is abandoning its Catholic identity. It is not a prerequisite that the commencement speakers' opinions be the most popular or shared by the greatest number of people.  I truly admire Georgetown's decision to extend the offer to Secretary Sebelius, and I hope that people do not make fools of themselves at the ceremony.

This year's MSB ceremony will be a bittersweet one for me, because this was the class that started their student careers just as I began working here, so it will be very emotional for sure.  I'm going to miss all of them!!! Let's see if I can make it through this year's graduation without sobbing.  It's doubtful, because the Alma Mater gets me every time.  Congratulations to the Class of 2012, and may Georgetown live forever!

A Much-Needed Long Weekend

This weekend, I took a much-needed Friday off, mostly to spend time with Dan before he started his new job (today is his first day, and I'm sending lots of good karma across the river for him!!).  I had some training for work on Thursday afternoon that allowed us some additional time together in the afternoon, which was so nice.  We went out for a delicious seafood dinner at Grillfish, one of our favorites, and followed that up with milkshakes at Johnny Rocket's, another of our favorite activities (I was also having a weird milkshake craving, which I almost never have). 

On Friday, we had the main event, riding our bikes to Mt. Vernon and back. We stopped in Old Town to pick up the bikes from my parents' house and also grab some food for the picnic we were planning on having.  We were both definitely a little bit rusty on riding a bike (even though, as they say, it's just like riding a bike!), so we had some minor seat adjustment issues (at one point, Dan said it looked like I was riding a tricycle because I was so low to the ground!), but other than that it was a nice 22ish-mile ride!  We were definitely exhausted when we stopped for our picnic of a baguette, cheese, jam, and LOTS of water halfway in, and were very reluctant to get back on our bikes because our asses were killing us, but we powered through it!  When we got back to my parents', we set our bikes down and lay in the grass for a solid 45 minutes or so in a heap of exhaustion.  We were both still sore the next morning (again, bike seats, not so comfortable for long rides; I would imagine that it was worse on Dan), but it was an amazing feeling to have just completed the ride, and it was a nice change-up from our normal runs.  We didn't actually end up walking around the Mt. Vernon grounds, mostly because it's expensive and the place was overrun with school groups on a Friday afternoon, but we were content to just sit on a bench, enjoy our food and bask in the beautiful weather.

During our lunchtime stop at Mt. Vernon

Accurate representation of what we did after the bike ride

My mom hadn't been feeling well, so I stayed at their place to shower and then help her cook, and I also got to DRIVE!!!! I both wanted the practice driving (it had been over a year) and I knew she wasn't feeling well, so I volunteered to drive to Georgetown to get Tim. It was definitely harrowing to be on the driver's side of Georgetown, and I was drenched in sweat by the time we got back to the house, but I did it! And I did a good job! Dan came back after having showered at home, and once my dad got home we had ourselves a nice little 21st birthday party for Tim.  I can't believe my original baby doll is all grown up (seriously, my mom tells me that I wouldn't leave him alone, because I thought he was my baby and just wanted to play with him all the time)!!  Below is a picture of one of our earliest photo shoots.  As you can see, I, ever the style maven, am rocking the '90s bowl cut/mullet, which was a mainstay of my childhood.  I think that the picture below would be my equivalent of Mindy Kaling's and Tina Fey's embarrassing (but strangely cute at the same time) childhood photos in their respective books. Also notice the presence of chub in this picture.  Let's just say that neither of us were small in our youth...

On Saturday, Dan had to be up and out early for yet another round of golf (he played nearly every day during his week of funemployment!), so I helped my dad with some Mother's Day shopping and went for a run in Old Town before meeting up with Lauren for a delicious dinner at Posto, an Italian place on 14th.  It was so nice to catch up, and we got to do more of that when we headed over to Policy and met up with Molly. After ordering drinks downstairs, we migrated upstairs for some GREAT dancing.  When we felt that that had gotten too crowded, we walked over to Admo and stopped by our mainstay, Brass Monkey. We remarked that the crowd there seemed very young (making us, young professionals two tiny years removed from graduation, feel very old), but we had no problem throwing the towel in early and dragging our old lady selves home.  I left with more dignity than the three girls who tumbled from a stool and hit the ground hard, undoubtedly flashing some people in their too-short skirts.  So I think that, although we felt like grandmas for leaving early, we left with our dignity (and our clothes) intact.

Sunday was largely a lazy day, but I did get the chance to Skype with Kate (yay!) and then meet up with Colleen and Jess at a wine bar, which was really nice.  I loved getting the chance to catch up with the two of them, especially considering the imminence of their respective departures from DC. It was a great ending to an overall lovely weekend!

Also, Sunday was Mother's Day (duh)!  I didn't end up going over to my parents' since I had spent so much time there this weekend, but I talked to my mom oh, I don't know, five or six times on the phone.  My appreciation for my mother has absolutely grown since my college years and, while we are dramatically different in certain respects, I consider her to be one of my best friends, and I love her beyond description.  The fact that I am just a metro ride away from she and my dad is an indescribable blessing, and I feel lucky every day that I have such an amazing mother who is beautiful both inside and out.

I hate to end my post on a serious note, but I wanted to briefly mention a serious issue.  On Saturday night, someone very close to me was mugged.  This person is physically unharmed, but is still very much affected emotionally by the gravity what happened to them.  I have personally been very shaken by this incident as well, and want to urge everyone, especially those of you who live in a big city, to not walk home by yourself at night.  I know that it can be easy to give in to the temptation walking to avoid paying for a cab, but it is proven, at least in D.C., that there is a rise in crime in the summer months.  So please, be particularly vigilant, and don't put yourself in a potentially dangerous situation by walking by yourself, especially in a neighborhood that is unfamiliar to you, and MOST especially if you have been drinking.

Yet Another Manic Monday

Jeez louise, was it ever difficult to get up this morning...I think I was just in denial over the fact that the weekend is over! I know I say it all the time, but I really have no idea where the time has gone!

The weekend started a little bit early on Friday afternoon when my office had a Cinco de Mayo party.  It was a great way to unwind at the end of a long week, and everyone brought in delicious Mexican-inspired food and drinks for the occasion.  My dad even stopped by- he had a meeting on campus, so dropped by afterward- and I know that he enjoyed meeting my coworkers, and vice-versa.  As is the case with him, he makes friends wherever he goes!

Obviously, since I had gorged myself on Mexican goodness at our little fiesta, dinner was not happening for me, so I accompanied Dan to get a pizza, and then we snuggled up on the couch and watched The Shawshank Redemption.  It was a fantastic movie (it was my very first time seeing it, and it happens to be Dan's favorite movie), although definitely a tearjerker at times.  We split some cupcakes that I had bought at Baked &Wired for the occasion of Dan's new job (yayyyyyy!)- if you'll notice, I couldn't bring myself to eat dinner, but I obviously made room for dessert ;)

On Saturday, I headed over to my parents' house after a great run and spent the afternoon with them.  I always enjoy going over to Old Town for the change of scenery, and I hadn't seen my parents in a few weeks, so a visit was definitely in order! We just hung around and watched some sports (duh), since both the Caps and Nats were in town (it was a busy sports day in DC!).  Afterward, I met up with Dan and his friends at his friend's apartment after they went to the Nats game.  It was a really nice night; we hung out in the apartment for a while, and then headed outside to the apartment complex's courtyard, where we grilled and chatted.  I really love hanging out with his group of friends, and they have made me feel so welcome since the first time I hung out with them last April.  I feel more like another of their friends than I do an outsider who happens to be dating their friend, so I'm very grateful to them for making me feel so included.  Afterward, we went to RFD (I felt so awful, I think I nearly crushed Dan, whose lap I had to sit on during the cab ride there) and then called it a night relatively early.

Yesterday, I was able to meet up with Lauren for a bit and chat and eat cookies, which is always welcome in my book.  Then, Dan and I went to Founding Farmers, where we had decided to go for a celebratory dinner on the occasion of his new job.  The food was DELICIOUS (we got a delicious appetizer of cornbread from a skillet), so I was glad that we had made the trek downtown on a Sunday night and braved the crowds.  By the time we got home, it was almost time to go to sleep, so we just lounged around like lazy bums haha.  And this week begins his week of what I call "funemployment", because he decided to give himself a week off before starting the new job a week from today.  He'll be playing a LOT of golf this week to take advantage of courses that are more expensive on the weekends, and part of me wishes I could take a weeklong vacation and just hang out with him (read: ride around in the golf cart with him haha).  I AM, however, going to take Friday off, and we're really hoping the weather will hold off so we can ride bikes to Mt. Vernon and have ourselves a little picnic.  I'm really looking forward to that, as well as the short week ahead!

I hope you all had wonderful weekends!

Back on my Soapbox Again

During my morning read of the New York Times, I found this article about 14 year-old Julia Bluhm, a Maine-bred 8th grader who is petitioning Seventeen magazine to include "real girls" (girls with a human amount of body fat, skin blemishes, tan lines, etc.) on its pages, as a first step to ending the airbrushing practices of lifestyle and high fashion magazines. I was really torn when I read this article; at first, I was smiling from ear to ear because someone was sticking it to the man and addressing a really pressing issue.  (Shameless plug: If you haven't already read my post about Miss Representation, a documentary that examines, you guessed it, the misrepresentation of women in the media and the hindrance this poses to women who otherwise would have aspired to careers in politics, business and entertainment, read it.  More importantly, go see the movie, or get the DVD from Netflix.)

However, as proud as I am of Julia for the crusade that she is leading (which, hopefully, more magazines and news outlets will take notice of; as a side note, I saw on the news this morning that Vogue is banning "too-thin" models from their photo shoots.  While "too-thin" is certainly subjective, it makes me really hopeful that such an iconic publication is declaring its commitment to change), I am still afraid for her.  Young girls (and even young women my age) are facing an enormous amount of societal pressure to conform to the ideal standards of beauty in a way that appears to be effortless.  Julia is a beautiful girl, based on the picture in the article, but I wonder if she simply is too young to have been exposed to those societal pressures yet and, thus, is better able to fend it off.  What will happen when she gets to high school, I wonder?  Or better yet, college?  I am afraid that even the most well-intentioned of these young girls will be pressured to conform to that same ideal, and will develop accompanying insecurities, such as eating disorders and a severe lack of self-respect and self-worth.  I am afraid for the future daughters I hope to have, because will it be worse by the time we get to their generation?  However, the fact that there is a dialogue, and we as a society are becoming increasingly aware of the ways in which the media manipulates women, makes me hopeful that, together, we can affect change.   

Time Flies When You're Having Fun

Holy crow, how is it May already??  I was thinking about our Europe trip this weekend, from which we returned four months ago, when it feels like that trip was almost a year ago.  In case you're wondering, yes, the wanderlust is already kicking in again :-/  Anyway, I can't believe that we're already so far in to 2012, and I have been so ridiculously busy that I haven't realized how quickly it has been moving.

This weekend was a really fantastic one, albeit WAYYYYY too short (my Monday morning wakeup call was NOT a welcome one) and was a perfect blend of spending time with Dan and seeing friends.  On Friday night, Dan and I tried out Agora, this Mediterranean tapas-style place on 17th, which actually ended up being fabulous.  The ambience was great, the music choices were remarkable, and the food was delectable.  Lots of yummy fish :)  After that, we grabbed a quick drink at 18th Street Lounge, where Dan had never been before.  The music was Latin-y and didn't quite create the vibe we wanted, so we ended up heading home relatively early and relaxing chez moi.

On Saturday, I did some major baking in preparation for my friend Alex's barbecue that night (he always requests that I bring baked goods, and based on the number of people who are ususally there and the reception that my sweets get, I typically need to make a LOT of them) and then attempted a run.  I have had a flare-up of what I suspect is tendonitis in my ankle for the past week-and-a-half, which is due to my own unwillingness to take a day off from running (what can I say, if I'm in a running mood, I run!!!) and has put a serious damper on my workouts for the past few weeks.  I was able to run about four miles in total, but it wasn't pretty, so the bulk of my workout was on the elliptical (boo).  My top priority is obviously making sure I'm healthy for our half-marathon in September, so I know that I need to take care of my body now so that it does what I need it to do on race day.  It's funny how that relationship works, if you're kind to your body, it does amazing things in return :)

Anyway, I met up with Dan to go to the barbecue, and we spent the next several hours chatting with friends and celebrating Alex's time in DC.  It was definitely a more difficult goodbye than I was anticipating (it was also difficult to say goodbye to his precious dog, Wishbone), which makes me shudder to think about how tough it will be to say goodbye to Colleen when she leaves at the end of the month.  I keep reminding myself that she'll only be in Baltimore, but still, it's not the same when one of your closest friends moves away :(  Anyway, we went out to Town Tavern after the barbecue, but Dan and I, being the old farts that we are, didn't end up staying very long. 

We had to get up and moving pretty early on Sunday morning, since Dan had an early tee time, which was perfect, because it gave me time to fit a workout in before Lauren, Molly and I saw The Lucky One (cue judgmental head-shaking now).  Whatever, I liked it!  Nicholas Sparks novels are like crack to me, as are the movie adaptations of said novels, it turns out. After the movie, we walked around for a bit and then cooked dinner at Lauren's apartment while re-living the early 2000s with a few episodes of Felicity (and drooling over Scott Speedman).  I was not in a good mood when it was time to metro home and face the prospect of Monday morning.  But it was a fun weekend, it really was!

I have started off this week by getting some good friend time in.  I had a wonderful lunch with Lauren yesterday, during which I was reminded of the fact that I am so lucky to have her as a best friend (not that I needed the reminder at all!), and then followed it up with a fantastic dinner with my friend Jamie.  We got dinner at Zorba's in Dupont and chatted for hours, and, as I always tend to feel after our conversations, I walked away afterward feeling so fulfilled.  Tonight, I'm hopefully grabbing dinner with another friend who happens to be moving soon, so it should be good to see her.  I FINALLY get to pencil some time in with my Dan tomorrow, which I can't wait for. I was ready for it to be Wednesday yesterday (not to discount my lovely night with Jamie and what I'm sure will be a lovely night with Jess), and we remarked on Sunday how sad it is that three days without seeing each other is torturous.  I really shouldn't complain haha.  I could have it a LOT worse!  Nonetheless, I have loved having the chance to reconnect with friends over the last few weeks (I went to happy hour last week with Colleen and Patrick, both of whom are moving), and I'm having dinner with my Tim and the "siblings" on Thursday night, which is long overdue.  As usual, my weeks are light on "me" time, but I wouldn't have it any other way :)  Happy May, friends!  I have a feeling it's going to be a good month!