There is one thing that I always try to keep in mind while watching the shows: however fabulous it may be to be spirited away in a private jet to Curacao {this makes me laugh every time because of how consistently bad Emily and all three of the guys were at pronouncing this little island's name}, Prague, and every exotic location in between, shopping for expensive designer clothes and slow-dancing during a private concert with a semi-recognizable band, that could not be further from what real life is like. I would venture to guess that the expectation that life will be all about such grand gestures is one of the main reasons why the vast majority of the relationships on The Bachelor/Bachelorette fail. First of all, if life was one nonstop grand gesture, none of those bouquets of flowers, exotic trips or expensive diamonds would feel all that special anymore. Also, and this may shock some of you...ABC is paying for and organizing all of those dates {shhh, don't tell anyone}.
Speaking from my own experience, Dan and I are a very active couple, so we enjoy coming up with new and interesting things to do. However, with busy schedules and the budgetary restraints that come from being two young professionals, we can't just pick up and go on some grand adventure every time that we hang out. Frankly, I kind of like it that way! That makes trips to Boston, New York, to vineyards, farms, driving ranges, beaches, museums, historic homes, breweries and the like all the more special. And, to be honest, some of my very favorite moments of our relationship have come when we have been relaxing at home, have had a meaningful conversation, or are not even doing anything in particular. Interestingly, I also felt so happy and connected when we went on our 12-mile training run last summer as we prepared for our half-marathon. Running, as a shared interest, is something so convenient and fun to do together. I certainly don't feel my most glamorous or put-together when I'm running {particularly not in the summer, when I'm sweating like a pig}, but something about pushing my body to its limit, and sharing in that activity with the person I love, does make me feel strangely beautiful, sweat and all.
What I'm saying is, take the time to appreciate the little moments in your relationship, the things you don't necessarily plan, the lazy Sundays spent watching TV, and the conversations that help you get to know the people you love better. Actually, one of my favorite nights of our relationship came in August 2011, a month where I went on vacation with my family for a week, got to see Dan for about 18 hours, and then he went on vacation with his family for a week {and was delayed in getting home thanks to that pesky Hurricane Irene}. I was so elated to see him after so much time apart on that first day that he got back. Although he had driven through the night to get back to DC and could barely keep his eyes open, and even though we got dinner at the less-than-fancy Corner Bakery after spending an hour in the AT&T store replacing Dan's phone that had died over the weekend, I couldn't wipe the silly grin off of my face. We were doing such mundane errands and one of us was a complete zombie, but the important thing was that we were spending quality time together.
Lazy Sundays are the best!
via Bathwater
So cozy :) I mean, come on, the bride is wearing a sweater!
via Better Than Fine
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